Sunday, August 9, 2009

Feast or Famine

I have learned something about myself. I am not a good dieter. LOL, I'm sure that doesn't surprise you, but I don't mean it in the traditional way. Obviously I am not good at sticking to a diet. After awhile I get completely frustrated and bored with it, especially since a normal diet does not help me at all because of PCOS. What I really mean though, is that it's an all or nothing thing with me.

After getting up to 296 pounds I finally started taking Metformin. For awhile it wasn't doing any good at all, other than making me not feel too good. But I stuck with it and got my dose doubled. (Doc wanted to triple it but you have to take it with food and I cannot eat 3 meals a day!) Well, the weight has started to go down and for about a week I was losing about a pound every two days. Unlike most people who would be excited about that I just started stressing. You see, if I can lose 1 pound in two days, something in my brain thinks if I eat a bit less I can lose a pound in ONE day. And if I can lose a pound a day, why not TWO pounds a day, etc...

I think my head is back on track now, at least FOR now but I have to be so careful. I don't want to slip into bulimic thinking, or go the other way and give up because I'm not losing as fast as I'd like to.

On a totally different note,

I HAVE A JOB!!!!! After 6 years of going back and forth to Canada and working there...after not being allowed to work in the United States...I finally have my Green Card, SSN, and a job. I've even got my first paycheck, LMAO. I got a check for $25.85 for 3 hours worth of training and orientation. I have never been so proud of such a small amount. My "real" paychecks start at the end of next week, but this one was special. I even paid a teeny tiny bit of tax, lol.